HEALTHY LONELINESS
In my reading and studying today, I came across an article entitled “Healthy Loneliness.” The title captured my attention, for we (Victoria and I) have been at a place where there seems to be an abundance of loneliness in our lives.
Before you misunderstand me – when we refer to loneliness, we’re not referring to a lack of friends and family, (God has blessed us with that) rather a season where we seem to be walking in inadequacy and with no back up or support. It’s a lonely time. It’s obviously a season where God’s is making adjustments and redefining us to a lowest common denominator.
Ever felt like this before? During these times, our emotions are off the charts. For starters, the sentiment of inadequacy becomes overwhelming at times. It gives the appearance that everyone is doing better than we are and we are the only ones suffering. Secondly, we feel that everyone is happier than we are. Ever felt that way? We know it’s incorrect, but we fall prey to it anyways… Hey, just being honest here. I still still bleed red blood like everyone else. 🙂
At the end of the day, leadership requires walking alone for seasons at a time. And it’s in these lonely seasons when God does His greatest work in us. What we are feeling and thinking are the very things God wants out of us. And this only happens during seasons of “healthy loneliness.”
The article I read said, “We often judge the degree of our failure against the degree of someone else’s success. Failure is only real if you quit.” And quitting is not an option. Not to us at least… Be encouraged, I know I am.
Pastor Manny
That must of been a good article. It is a little confusing though cause usually being lonely is bad but in this case it is good/ healthy.
The statement at the end stood out to me most. I am guilty of comparing where I am to the success of other people, especially the ones that I know. The thought of quitting has come up a few times, but that is an option that is not available to me. This blog has encouraged me to continue pressing forward, regardless of what happens.
I really liked the title Heathly Loneliness on today’s blog. Being alone for many years
can put you in a deep pit if you let it: needless I have been there. You can be in a room
with many friends and loved ones and still feel OH so lonely. Thinking about I should of,
could of and would of only keeps you back. You do not ever have to feel lonely just
reach out for GOD and remember to touch your heart and you will feel the HOLY SPIRIT
with you. Loneliness is just a feeling and a destructive one at that.
Wow, thank you for your realness. We have been there so many times, always comparing ourselves to others. I am thankful that during those times I have been able to turn around and feel bless of where we are. God is always there and he is faithful.
Healthy silence, to be at a place only God can reach; not your mother, father, sister, brother, friends, husband or any other thing that you may feel will fullfill that void. If we never felt the need, to need Him then we would never seek Him. I know when I feel inadequate Im thankful God isnt, and that gives me the hope to continue to run towards the mark.
The above statement is mine. not mannys..lol
It has been in my lonely times that I eventually realize that I am not in fact alone, but God is always with me. I’ve been there many times and it can get quite depressing but sometimes necessary for God to reveal what He wants us to see.
I’ve felt like that before too but especially since the beginning of this year…I literally felt like a martian or that I was going through some type of exorcism..because like you said the feeling is not pleasant at all…still God’s love’s been there all along He makes me know that I’m loved by Him and that really gives me peace, the peace of knowing that everything it’s gonna be alright and that this is very much necessary. I’m very encouraged by this blog and by the word that God gave us tonight during prayer !!!!…very excited about the retreat…I can’t wait 🙂
I know at times I feel lonely and like everyone else is doing better than me. I am coming to understand that at the end of the day God just wants my heart so he can use me to accomplish his will. May I turn my sad lonliness into happy and healthy loneliness.
I enjoy my lonely times, when I just thinking and meditating in God’s word. We have been created to be social people, but I know that are on those moment of loneliness when God speaks in a more personal way. If I’m not mistaking a lot of Bible characters were given the clarity of their assignment by God in their time of loneliness.
I’ve definitely felt like this more than once. Thank God it’s only for a season and He knows what He’s doing in our lives. We just need to stay focused and continue to move forward even when we feel “lonely”.
“What we are feeling and thinking are the very things God wants out of us. And this only happens during seasons of “healthy loneliness.”
I can definitely relate to this blog. The statement above is its key purpose, and if understood, we will soon find ourselves entering into an place of peace, strength and joy in Him. We more often that not find ourselves asking questions such as…
1. Why am I here?
2. Has God forgotten about me?
3. Will I ever get out of this hole?
4. Does every one see me the way I see myself?
5. How long am I going to be here?
The questions we should ask is, God what are you trying to teach me? What are you trying to get out of me? Thank you for this insight. Needed it.
I am there right now, not fun…
Very encouraged. I think we all go through that at times. I think that’s where the things God needs to workout in us take place. It’s always in the quiet for me.
I am encouraged Pastor, and for us as Gods children I know all will be well. One of my mentors in my early twenties once told me; ‘Vic, in life, things/ circumstances aren’t always as they seem. For God will never (take us to a place)/ or stage in life that he is not able to (take us through.)
He’s the God of the City! and we will never give up/or stop P.U.S.H.I.N.G until he comes. Amen.
it not healthy being loneliness when it comes to the ministry because we need to be with people that loves us and care for us. we have to understand that if we don’t have anybody to help us when we are in a bad place.
Been there still fight it especially the older I get. Expectations of being at a totally different place and I’m not why, why not, where did I go wrong. In these times I must continue to stand on His word and His promises and Never give up. Be at rest be at peace. God is in control. Must continue to be obedient and allow him to mold my life. Comparing ourselves to everyone else is just a ploy of the enemy to bring donut and discouragement in our lives. Cannot look at our circumstances and what everything LOOKS like. Our God is the God of the impossible!!
Pastor I know exactly what you mean. I’m at that place as well, and yes it’s not a fun place to be in, however, it’s in that place that I am able to reevaluate and make changes as the Holy Spirit reveals things to me.
After all God had to take Abraham out of the tent, away from everyone else to show him His true plan. Even then it was hard to comprehend. Sometimes we have to be totally alone with God and it’s a good thing because that is where dreaming begins.
Absolutely! We’ve all been there at some time, and many of us are there now. As I was leaving home today I thought I audibly heard God say…”Be faithful and don’t worry about the feelings of shortcoming or being alone. Be faithful, son!” So I will….
I’m totally there at this moment in my life!